Sunday, October 25, 2009

How to get a good manicure


One time I tripped over my troll feet and fell backwards, spilling the polish and leaving a permanent stain on the wall of the ginormous jetted tub that I wasn't supposed to use because "baths are expensive." So why buy a house with a ginormous fucking tub then? I'm glad the polish stain is still there. May it live long and prosper. And anyway, I did take baths, in secret, and had a great time with those powerful jets, too. Muhahahaha!

But that's all a crock, so I walked away from the tub and tiled kitchen counters and a back yard and a writing shed and herbs and flowering cherry trees that bloom twice a year. I donated my Kitchenaid mixer to a great guy in the office who has been using it to make loaf after loaf of homemade bread with his new bride and can't stop smiling.

I can't stop smiling, either. I walked away from powerful jets and spilled polish and the word "no" and I finally learned a thing or two about beauty treatments.

Wanna know how to get a good manicure? Find a man who's not afraid to show the lady a little love...and who knows how to keep the squirmy ones from making a mess.

"Don't mess up your polish now......hold very, very still.....or else."



ps -- powerful jets ain't nuttin. sing it, ladies! R.E.S.P.E.C.T.!

8 comments:

Erobintica said...

:-)

Craig Sorensen said...

You tell 'em, Gina.

Gina Marie said...

Singing a happy tune!

Shanna Germain said...

Love it!!! Woo-woo!!

And omg, my "word verification" word is:

toliv!!!!

no shit!

Gina Marie said...

Woo-woo back at you, Shannalicious! Putting together that collection for MindFuck. Yip skip.

BadAssKona said...

Business is pickin' up!!

WV: "entur"
Def: Do I REALLY need to define this??

Gina Marie said...

Hmmmm.....what other services do they offer at the Slut Salon?

BadAssKona said...

Immobile pedicures are all the rage...

WV: "ilimp"
Def. Not what I am around you...